Again, I am undecided on a title for this post, but I will just leave it blank.

In this post I want to discuss my new discovery. Or rather "discoveries". And that would be new genres (talking about books).

I have been getting more and more into reading (almost a love/hate, on again/off again relationship) and have been venturing into new genres.

I still enjoy romance, as well as comedy. But I have been getting into Murder Mysteries/ Thrillers/ Crime novels, as well as some Fiction. I've been experimenting with authors as well. Right now I'm reading the Hannibal series by Thomas Harris. I finished Red Dragon and am now on  The Silence of the Lambs.

But over the past few days I have found a few books I want to start reading. I want to read The Diary of Anne Frank, as well as a book called Your Creative Brain, which is Psychology. I want to start reading books that are somewhat "self-help". Books that help me improve myself.

With the New Year quickly approaching, I figured that would be the best thing for me.

Unsure of a Title..

Tuesday I went to visit my friend and some family. I stayed until Thursday afternoon. But I must say that Tuesday night was the most fun. I had the opportunity to watch my grandma play the Wii. We all died of laughter. My arm is sore from ping pong and playing the Wii. I had a blast. I wish my grandma lived closer because I could do that every weekend.

Thursday, however, wasn't that much of a blasty-blast. It was an eventful day, I believe. I left my parents house to go home, stopped for gas, and was at a red light waiting to turn left so I could hop onto the freeway. Well, the car in front of me wasn't moving (the surrounding traffic was) and the light had turned green. I started to move because I didn't want to roll back into a car behind me. Well, I ended up bumping into the car in front of me. Long story short, she was a girl around my age. It was her first "accident" and she had to call the cops or her mom would "kill" her if she didn't. There was no damage. Nothing was exchanged. Everyone was okay. The cops didn't even ask for information. I didn't get a ticket, which was great.

I stopped at Walmart when I got back home, because my ring came in yesterday!!

I made a second trip to Walmart, noticed it got extremely foggy, and while I was waiting in line with my arms filled with stuff, their power went out. It was rather creepy. Eventually they sent everyone home. Every store surrounding the Walmart, was out of power. But I was relieved to see lights once I drove past the railroad tracks. I was happy to have power.

Now the last thing I would like to add before I make this post any more off-topic: I think I solved my book writing dilemma.
I've always wanted (and tried) to write a book. But I have found it difficult to stick to one story that fills an entire book. So I realized I could write and publish short stories! Haha, that is all! Problem solved.

Team Hannibal Lecter

Ever since watching The Silence of the Lambs and Hannibal for the first time a couple months ago, I've become a little obsessed.
Right now I'm reading the books, starting with Red Dragon (by Thomas Harris). I watched the movie the other day and it was brilliant!
It could be that I'm obsessed with Sir Anthony Hopkins. He is PURE GENIUS! The way he portrays Dr. Lecter, is remarkable. I find the character likable. Lecter is genius as well. I'm a fan.
That might be odd to admit. He is a murderer, but he's smart.

I'm surprised that it took me this long to find these books. A few months ago I've ventured into a new book genre (for me) and that's Mystery/Thriller. These books fall right into that, and after watching the Hannibal movies, I'm wondering why I didn't go after the books. I feel like I should have known that The Silence of the Lambs was a book to start off with. But I'm enjoying the books as I get into them.

The last thing I'd like to mention about this whole experience: I usually have a difficult time reading a book AFTER watching the movie. Usually when I find out that it's a book I try to read it BEFORE I watch the movie, but here I just couldn't wait. I have no problem picturing/thinking of Hopkins as Lecter while reading. Usually the movie ruins the book for me because I end up picturing the actors as the characters. My imagination doesn't get to run wild on it's own without any outside help from the movies. The Twilight books were great, but the movie (I've only watched Twilight) has ruined it for me. Edward was so hotter when I thought him up myself.

But these books, I don't mind it. It's rare. Usually I'm forcing myself to get through the books after I've watched the movie. Or I'm skipping the book altogether and I watch the movie or just stick with the movie. I find no difficulty with this. I think of these books as a diary after watching the movies. I wanted more of the Lecter story (more movies) so in a way these books feed that hunger, as it were.

Officially Engaged!

Yesterday still feels like a dream. Andy gave me an early Christmas present, an engagement ring! I was so surprised! I'm still like, wow! He couldn't wait until Christmas to give it to me. We took it to get it sized, so I hope it comes in next week! I'll have pictures when I get it : )

We don't have a date set, because we're taking it one step at a time. This was the next step after 2 years dating. I feel like I've been with him forever already. 

Next step after this is to help him find a farm to milk his cows. If there's a small house on the land that would be an added bonus. It seems so hard to come by, being in an area that's surrounded by farm land. 

I'm just daydreaming. I told the woman I babysit for that I'm spending Christmas with my "well, now fiance.." She was so excited for me and gave me a hug and congratulated me! 

*sigh* : )

We've talked about getting married before, but we just left it at that. Which doesn't mean we changed our minds. I don't care if we're engaged for 5 years! As long as we can find stable ground to get our lives as a couple together. My rule of thumb, to be living together before getting married. We can get away with being engaged and not living together (for the first year or two - depending on how lucky he can get finding land).

Again, I'm in no hurry. I was perfectly happy taking it one day at a time before the ring came into play. But I'm just as happy!

He kept asking if I like the ring. If it was a "Yes". 

Of course I said YES!

I also said, "You know, a lot of girls look at the ring and go YES. They say yes to the ring and not the man it seems." So I looked him in the eye and said YES!

To hear him say I'm the love of his life, and he wants to be with me forever brings a tear to my eye, just thinking about it.

I don't know where I would be without him. He has helped me through a lot over the years. And not just the past 2 years. We've known each other for like, 6 years or so.

I have never loved anyone this much!

I miss having a dog.

I live in an apartment and no pets are allowed. I am ok with that, because I'd rather be in a house with a yard. I'd love to have a dog. I really miss Bandit :'(

And I miss my grandmas dog, Kruzer. Kruzer is a black lab, he's huge but is SO well behaved. I used to be scared of him and not like big dogs. And OMG I love him!
Bandit is a Lhasa Apso, I picked him out and my brother picked out Smokey. Smokey got to be too aggressive, so Bandit ended up being a family dog after giving Smokey away.

I miss having a buddy to go outside with. I want a walking buddy. That's why I'd love to have a dog. Not sure what breed, but a dog nonetheless. I know they are expensive to take care of, so thats another reason why I'd wait. Having a pet that loves you and depends on you and misses you when you're gone is one of the best feelings in the world.

Not so Happy December

I've wanted to say "Happy December" but I no longer want to... It has already snowed a bit. Ugh. Snow is only great when you don't have to go out in it. WHY, OHIO, WHY?!

And to top it all off, I've got some kind of head cold. I'm congested and I wish I could BREATHE properly. This is sad news for me :(

Hmm, I babysit Saturday for a few more hours. Yay more money!

This is all random. So to add to that, I wanna try some new makeup. I'm thinking the Maybelline Dream Smooth Mousse foundation, the Dream Mousse concealer, Dream Mousse blush, and a setting powder by Rimmel.

Weird mixture I guess. Oh and I want to try to use brown mascara, as well as liner. I figure brown would look more natural since my lashes are so light, and my eyes are blue - browns always enhance that. I'll make a post of what I end up getting, when I get them. Might be separate posts, I won't get it all at once.

Just my thoughts. Drug Mart is having 50% off Wet 'n' Wild cosmetics, so I'll be all over that this weekend.

Okay, I need sleep. Later!


Twitter: @epik_soul

Over 50 posts?! Yay me!

I have to say that this blog has gotten more attention from me than any other attempt at blogging. I've been eager to blog before, but never stuck with it. Why this time is different, I'm not sure. But I'm rather proud of myself. I'd love to get more followers/comments and just feedback in general, but honestly if all I get are comments from @Gabi then I have no problem with that. <3

I need to get back to sleep. I went to bed at 8 p.m. out of boredom and it's been raining ALL day and night, so when my boyfriend called around midnight/one a.m.-ish I couldn't fall back asleep. And I've been sneezing my head off, how fun... So I feel pretty yucky. Maybe I'll stick with tea the next few days. I've gotta knock this somehow. Until I get paid Friday then I'll stick with what I have. Call me cheap, poor, whatever. I just don't like new things THAT much?

Oh well...and hey I might be changing the name of the blog from Bookie Brat to something about reviews. I want to start making YouTube videos reviewing random products and of course I'll have my in-depth review posts on my blog here. This blog is all over the place, so maybe it's odd that I have a blog for food stuff..I dunno. I do random book reviews here too, so that's why I want to do more reviews. I love talking about stuff. Duh.

Fang..

I just finished reading Fang by James Patterson. Again, it's another book in the Maximum Ride series. I've lost track of what book it is (number 6, I had to check). This won't be an official book review, but I can sum up how I feel about the book. LOVED IT! There. Now go read. ALL of them. I promise, it won't take you long.

So the reason I'm writing this is because, well, at the end of the book there was an ad for a contest. You enter a chapter for a Maximum Ride book. Problem. You have to be 15 to 18. LAME. I'm almost 20! This is really upsetting. I don't care if you're 13 and reading these books, I'm 20 and I LOVE them. I've never read anything like them. Whether it be Young Adult or Adult. They are just fabulous.

But with that little disappointment I felt the need to go through my OLD writing on this OLD laptop of mine. While it's behaving #thingsthatdonthappenoften.

I'll be off then...and I'm sure I'll let ya'll know what I choose to do with the old writing.

New Haircut (more official post)

I talked briefly about my new haircut. It might be an odd topic, but it's a blog that doesn't cover a specific topic. I cover random life things as well as book reviews. I have now have a blog for food related stuff.

I wanted to share a picture of my new haircut. So I'll make this the more "official" post.

I love this hairstyle too. I curled it with my hair straightener. I let my hair air dry after washing it, and re-dampened my bangs, ran the straightener over them so they didn't stick straight out and the layers show. Then I just curled my hair. You can find tutorials on YouTube if you really want to know how. Try the one by JLovesMac1, she's not only hilarious but her tutorials are great quality!

Well, I hope ya'll had a great Thanksgiving! Mine was wonderful. Well, it's almost pizza time. Just waiting for my baby to get home from work :)

It's early, like 2:30 am, but HAPPY TURKEY DAY!

Ok, so I haven't been to sleep because I've been baking cookies and reading Fang by James Patterson. His books keep me up. It's another book in the Maximum Ride series. Love it.
I wanted to write a blog saying how quickly I can get through these books. Yeah, the chapters are written shorter, which makes it a quick read. But they're really good books. He's such a great writer, just from reading this series alone. I haven't ventured into any of his other series just yet, but I bought 1st to Die for a dollar a few months ago.

Oh and I wanted to add a picture with my last post, but my computer was acting up. I'm sure I'll get to it this weekend. I'll have my shortbread cookie recipe up with pictures then and how today (Thanksgiving) goes. I'll write it here as well, minus the recipe.

Remember my new blog eat-freak.blogspot.com

New Hair!

Just a short post about me getting my hair cut. It was long overdue. I got the blonde ends cut off and now I'm all natural redhead!! Woot!! It's been YEARS since I've had my natural hair color! And bangs.

Saturday was pretty eventful. Andy came over in the afternoon and spent a majority of the day with me. We ran a few errands and walked around the mall a bit. We never have a reason to go in there, but we always find stuff to talk about and look at. This time I made him go with me to sniff some of the perfumes. And I gotta say, some of those celebrities need to get their noses checked! That new fragrance by Britney Spears, gag-city! Bleh.
Although the one by Kim Kardashian smells really unique and was growing on me.
Personally, my favorite perfume is Intimately Beckham For Her. My boyfriend got me a full size bottle of perfume and the lotion a year ago. He loves it too, reminds him of me. And I first smelled it a couple years ago in Target, and my mom found these sample bottles, just these tiny things, for a dollar at Walgreens or maybe on sale for fifty cents. And that's when Andy and I were hooked. Y'all can keep your DKNY too. The one for men is a gag-fest.
I am curious about some sample stuff I found at Big Lots. I wonder what Tim McGraws fragrance smells like, so I might buy a little thing to see if Andy likes it.
Oh and if you ever plan on getting a fragrance for your special someone, make sure YOU like it too. Some people don't think about it too much, some sniff and think they might like it. But if you like it and they like it, go for it. You'll be the one smelling them all the time.

We also ordered a pizza and rented a couple of movies. District 9 sucked. The new Nightmare on Elm Street was pretty good. Even though I'm a Robert Englund - Freddy Krueger fan all the way.
That was pretty much my Saturday. My Sunday was just filled with going to CVS, Drugmart, Rite Aid, Walmart, Dollar General, Big Lots, and Family Dollar. Found some nail polish. Painted my nails in a trial-error plaid design.

I made a new blog, in the post before this I put the link. It's called Eat Freak. I'll be posting recipes and food related stuff. I've been feeling creative in the culinary department.
Well that's all for now. Should be sleeping, but I've got so much on my mind.

Holiday Treats - The Beginning (Eat Freak)

You will almost always find me in the kitchen, but I don't do as much baking or cooking as you might think or that I would like to be doing. I've never been big on making holiday treats, but I have helped out in the kitchen for the holiday meals. I've always liked to experiment with different dishes and play around with spices. I'll usually think of different variations of a certain dish or come up with several dishes for one main ingredient. Now that the holidays are closing in, it's time I step out of the box I'm afraid of leaving and cook up something new.

One of my many habits when it comes to "inventing" recipes is I won't always test out the recipe to see if it works. I just figure things up like "this and this go well together, why not add this". And maybe that's where stepping out of the box might help me. I will be able to successfully pass on my tweaked recipes with confidence.

And it's not that I don't enjoy trying new things, it's the lack of confidence I have in myself and my ability to cook. I'm no "chef to be discovered", just someone who hopes to bring good dishes to the table. I don't want a cooking show, but shelves lined with spiral notebooks filled with my recipes and others I've found or that have been shared.

My first holiday themed treat I will share (un-tested, un-tasted) will be my idea of shortbread cookies.
With a simple, buttery shortbread recipe, I plan on dipping some of the baked good-ness into milk chocolate AND white chocolate. Sprinkle some with peppermint candies, and some with red and green sugar sprinkles. I will use almond extract in place of vanilla because almond extract gives an amazing flavor!

I can't wait to test it out and let you know how it goes. I will then share pictures and the recipe I used.

Here's to the holiday treats. Cheers!

{Eat Freak} Check out my second blog: eat-freak.blogspot.com

I finally got my bag of writing from my car yesterday. I found my book of quotes I started. I've decided to get that going again. I've always enjoyed quotes. I even made up a few of my own.
So I've been meaning to write a book of some sort, but I've run into a few problems. First I figured I would finish the many I've started, but my style of writing has changed over the years.
Lately I've been stressed and have had heartburn something fierce. I've been wondering what to do with my life and when I ask what I'm good at, I'm told writing. Ok, that's fine and well, but I can't seem to figure out what I'm good at writing. What genre am I best at? It's a matter of preference I suppose, and I've never really gone in one direction with my writing. All I know is that I enjoy writing my own made up stuff. But I'm scared to make things up, aside from just the characters. And the characters are another issue altogether. I can never get the names right. But back to my fear of make-believe. For some reason I feel like my setting needs to take place somewhere real, when I know it doesn't. I am not one to travel. And I fear that I'm horrible at research. I don't know what I like writing the most. I've read more romance than any other genre in my life, I can write a story out, but is that what I'm best at? Am I stuck with romance? I know I can venture out of that box, and I can make up places and things. Just look at Douglas Adams. And of course you have the ever popular: Lord of the Rings, Hogwarts and Harry Potter, and The Chronicles of Narnia.
I have no idea what to do, or what to write but I know once I get something written, I can submit it to Barnes and Noble as an ebook. Which I'm excited to learn more about.

So if anyone I know reads this, PLEASE give me some feedback here!

November already

One more month left in the year after this. And next Sunday is daylight savings time, woot. I love going back an hour.
Life has been slow and boring. I'm not over a lot of things but I'm getting there. I really should stop caring about certain stuff, but I let it run my life and mind. It is getting the best of me. I want to give up on so much. I get no feedback. I don't hear from anyone. I deleted a ton of people I don't talk to in my phone and on Facebook. I did a dramatic friend decrease on Facebook recently. They won't miss me.
No one really misses me. I wish I heard from people more often, but I'll just talk to myself instead. I'm annoyed with my own company and I can't stay positive.
I don't have many options with what to do with my life right now.
My life sucks and it's boring and quiet. Nothing entertains me and I even get bored and annoyed with my iPad.

Friday October 29, 2010

Lately I've been wanting things I don't really need, just things I'd like to have eventually. "Eventually" is a key word here. I have no problem being on a budget. I put a few dollars aside for a nail polish I want or a handful of items I can get under $10 a week. I can give myself a limit. It is probably easy because I make a list of things I'd like to have/that I am looking for. I have to "hunt" for certain items, which helps with the fact that I don't need it right away. Even when I find it, I don't go psycho. I make note of where I found it, that way I can save up and know where to go.
My wants might change. Like my nail polish color preference. Now I've never been big on painting my nails. Don't know why I wasn't or why I am now. But I am. The most I have painted my nails were black or a deep red with red shimmers. I still have those polishes too. But now it's time to update my list, write a few paragraphs on my finds. And share a few other things.

iPad vs Physical Books vs nook

I've enjoyed the iPad so far. I've had it for a few weeks and I have read an entire book on it, virtual cover to virtual cover. Some people prefer the nook or Kindle because it isn't backlit like the iPad, but it hasn't bothered me. Mainly because I use it more than my computer at the moment and it is easy to read on, in my opinion. But comparing the readability on the iPad to reading an actual physical book and what I know of the nook is the reason I'm writing this.

VS A "REAL" BOOK:
This is where it gets me. I LOVE having an actual book in my hands. I like being able to display them if I buy them. I do browse book prices on the 3 applications I have; nook (Barns & Noble), Kindle (Amazon), iBooks (Apple) and compare to the in store price and/or Half Price books store if I'm in Pickerington (which is rare anymore). I bought Sworn to Silence at the mall bookstore (Walden/Borders) for $8 (paperback). The sequel Pray for Silence just came out this summer and was $25 (hardcover) new. It was in the iBooks store for $11.99, but this is where I prefer the real book copy over virtual (even though virtual is great if there were a fire, but I don't have the money to have ALL of my books virtually) because I don't want to break up the series. I found Pray for half the new hardcover price and it was only a dollar or two more than the iBooks price, but I made the exception because of the series.

VS NOOK (what I know of it):
I do not own a nook, but my mom bought one when I was down there last. The readability is similar to that of the Kindle, which she was contemplating buying. She went with the nook and likes it. You can lend out books (only certain ones) for two weeks but only one time. Which is ridiculous because she bought the book. You also can get library books too.

OVERALL:
I enjoy the iPad, but if it's a series that I already physically own I will continue that. I also would like to see a library application. I'm sure that will be in the future, but until then I will enjoy a bit of both options.

Book Review: Pray for Silence by Linda Castillo

Just in time for October, another thriller to add to your reading list. Pray for Silence is the sequel to Sworn to Silence. If you read my review on the first you know that I loved the book. Expect to love this book too! I sure do. You are brought into the action right away and you can't escape. Still set in the heart of Painters Mill, Ohio. Holmes County Amish country. That's what I love about these books. They are amazingly written and they take place close to home. I'm still not sure if Painters Mill is real, but Holmes County and the other places that are mentioned are. I've lived in many of the places or been to the places mentioned. I recommend this book to someone, anyone who is interested in thrillers/murder mysteries. This is the perfect combination. This one might be a bit more graphic than the first, but if you can stomach watching Bones/NCIS/CSI then you could handle this. Although if you aren't the type who can handle "bad language" then it might not be for you. But aren't we old enough to handle a bit of cussing? It's more real that way. Not everyone is censored.

Book Review: Sugar Daddy by Lisa Kleypas

I know this is the first book in the Travis series and I read it last, but it didn't bother me that much. Since I recently acquired a free iPad through Kiwibox, my mom decided to buy a nook from Barnes and Noble. Through my nook application on my iPad my mom bought this book and leant it out for me. I will write a blog on what I think of the iPad for the use of reading vs a physical book and what I know of the nook so far.
But for the review of this book, it is just as good as the others, and since I've read all three in that series, I recommend them all. You can't read one without reading them all, not because you need to read in a certain order (you really don't have to) but because you want more with each book you read. It's the story behind Liberty, Hardy and Gage. You learn a lot, which is why it's the first book in the series. It really opens you up to the many characters.
It isn't like many of the other romance novels I have read. Although the sexy parts are steamy like every romance out there, it isn't too much and the storyline is great. Definitely give this series a try!

Selective fall.

This fall is what I call a selective fall. While it wasn't an entirely beautiful fall here, there were a few 'select' trees that were pretty. I have a few images in my mind that I'd like to paint sometime within the next few weeks. I know I should be able to next month sometime.
I wish fall were better this year. The temperature was weird as well as the weather. It looked mostly dead and wet. I am not looking forward to winter. It will be awful.

Time to craft.

I'm not entirely crafty, I'm not good at crotcheting and I can't knit the legit way. Instead I learned to use a loom knitter. I have the long looms and I love using yarn because I have this lovely contraption. I have made a scarf with it so far. I am in the works of re-knitting a blanket for Andy. I love yarn, maybe as much as books. They are so pretty to look at. I like the marbled ones. I'm going to have to stick to this. It really shouldn't take long. I just kept putting it off. It should be cold enough this winter to do crafts like this.

I bought a new yarn. It's black with color flecks in it. I find it to be festive looking.
I am going to turn it into a scarf. Once I get my camera back I'll get pictures.

Off topic, but there is a comforter at Walmart like the one I have only it has fall colors and leaves on it for 20$ so I might get that if it is still there in a few weeks. Then drag my other comforter from the car.
I really need to clean and organize my place. I think when you get into a new space and you are making yourself comfortable and you don't put everything away, typical clutter can be comfy. I need to break that habit.

I'm slowly realizing that I'm not needed by many people anymore. It used to be that anyone could come to me openly about anything. That doesn't happen now. I'm hardly asked how I am, not many are quick to respond. And when I pose the question that their life would be better without me, they try to convince me that it wouldn't.
I could tell you the obvious: TRY! Clearly I've tried. But when a silence goes on for more than a few months, why should we bother? I should cut ties with them and wish them well. Have a great life, sorry I'm no longer apart of it. I would love to have the relationship that we used to have. I would love to have my close friends back, the ones that mattered, but I don't. I don't have many left. And I'm not ready for it to be just me.
What we all have to realize at one point that we sometimes have to settle for less. But I can't help but to wonder if these past few years, our deep conversations and promises of always being friends and being there for each other were just empty promises? Because they sure were false hopes.
I'm not held back. I'm just limited. If my friendship ever meant anything to you like it had to me, then you'll try along with me. I gave you your space and now that I'm no longer apart of it, I wish like hell that I was. But I need to let go now. We'll never be as close as I hoped we could be. I will live with that someday. It's just hard to be in a new place with not a lot of people you know. Not that I knew many, but more than I know here.
I'm not saying that just having Andy isn't enough. He's more than enough when he's available aka not working. With him that's rare catching him not working. But I cherish every moment we get together. I just need someone to talk to when he's busy at work.
I might of made a new friend today. Not sure. I didn't catch her name. But she must live near by. She helped me lug a few things to my place. Nice girl. It would be nice for a new friend.

GMH (Gives Me Hope & Random Acts of Kindness)

I've known about FML (FMyLife.com) since my senior year of high school. I also stumbled across LGMH (Love Gives Me Hope), and now GMH (GivesMeHope.com). But today GMH is what has me writing today. It's depressing to admit that I'm surprised that people still act out in random acts of kindness. That some people still have it in them, after everything that goes on.

Do I think these people are crazy? Not in the least. THEY Give Me Hope.
But a fair warning, GivesMeHope.com will make you cry at LEAST once.

I've been sharing random posts on Facebook most of the day.
And so now I write this blog because of these posts.
Many of them are children saying and/or doing things that make everything better for someone.
A few of them, children go up to someone in uniform who is going to or returning home from the Military.

A few of the stories that choked me up:

"At work, I was ringing up a soldier that had just returned from Iraq. A man with his small son stepped into line behind him.

I While the soldier was getting out his wallet, the man stepped forward and paid for the soldier's items. Then told his son that's what heroes look like.

Great fathers GMH"

"I was at the airport and soldiers were boarding a plane to Iraq.

A little boy, about five, went up to one of the men and said, "When you're over seas, can you tell my mom I love her?

She's in the army like you, but daddy said she's not coming home, so can you tell her for me?"

His love GMH"


---
Now I've never had the courage to go up to someone in Military uniform and shake their hand and say 'ThankYou". But these men and women have the courage to go out and fight for their country, when I can't overcome a simple case of stage fright?

A Shining Light Upon the Tears

I've been living here in New Philly for almost 4 months now. And I know I don't talk about it much, or I feel as though I've talked about it enough, but my grandpa will have been gone for 3 months at the end of this month. My step-grandma has been gone for a little over 4 years now, but she's not why I'm writing.

I've been noticing the "grandfatherly" types whenever I go out. And you know what I think? "Some lucky kid has a grandpa." Or I'll notice elderly couples, and think back to the good times, when everyone was alive and well. Maybe it's something that's overlooked, or maybe it's just how I'm coming to terms with the whole thing.

I know I've cursed my grandpa up one way and down the other, talked shit about how he lived his last year of his life, but when I see people older than he was enjoying life; I don't know what to think. Sometimes I want to cry, because I don't have that anymore. Sometimes I just remind myself that I wasn't in his phone book on his cell phone after I left.

I'd always ignore his calls. I'd avoid conversation, even when he was being nice and saying I was "his beautiful girl even if I didn't love him anymore."

It's not that I stopped loving, in a way I stopped caring - for the way he was living and for what he was turning back into. The entire time I lived with him I just wanted my old Papaw back. But he slowly faded away once my Mamaw passed.

I hated what he had become in the end. I hated how he was alone, but he chose to be that way.
I can take a negative approach and turn it positive, without being sympathetic.
Then I can dig a little deeper and I lose control.

I've always been a sucker for "country songs/stories that make you cry harder" and usually on purpose.
I find a reason to cry and stick with it until my nose is stuffed and I'm holding my pillow while rocking myself to sleep.

I don't do that very often. Just when things start to bring tears to my eyes. I figure, while I'm shedding a few tears now I might as well get it all out of me. After that I'm usually good for a while.

Today, it happened, and I just wanted to share.

iPad

I had the best wakeup call ever!!! The FedEx guy came with my iPad!!! I am at the library with it now and am writing this on the iPad. I freaking love this thing! I have only had it for a few hours. I need WiFi in my place ASAP!

I am going to take a drive to visit BritBrit. I missed her birthday party and I want to hang with her for a bit.

Gosh, what else can I say? I've been getting a few looks here in the library but other than that nothing else. I might end up deleting the songs I have on here only because my good running laptop died, that dang plug wouldn't charge it. Oh well, I can still use my iPod touch to listen to all my music. I would still prefer that to using this to listen to music in the car.

Well that is all for now. I am super happy and excited!

Luck turned around.

My luck started to turn around when I noticed my phone was gone and my boyfriend got a phone call from the person who found it at the fair, and I got it back the same night.
I have been keeping active on Kbox for 2 months now, working to win an iPad, the 2nd contest and this last contest. I honestly wasn't sure if I would win. I felt like it was a really close call, both times.
During certain mornings I have been keeping up with Kbox through the iPhone application on my iPod touch.
That is how I found out that I won. I was having lunch at Long John Silver's, found a WiFi connection and refreshed the website on Safari.
I had to calm myself and remind myself that I was in a public place, I can't cause a scene here by screaming "I WON AN iPAD!"
So to calm myself, the first person I called was my mom. I told her where I was and explained that causing a scene for winning the iPad was out of the question. I've been congratulated many times and I want to thank you ALL for your support and thank Kiwibox for holding these contests. If it weren't for you, I would not have had this opportunity elsewhere.
I absolutely love the fact that my BEST FRIEND from high school won the 1st iPad contest!! She is also the one who introduced me to Kiwibox years ago.

Lucky!

Yesterday was quite a day. Well, mostly the evening was interesting.
Andy and I went to the fair and watched the tractor pull. I had a great
time. Andy and I shared an elephant ear and he tried a funnel cake for
the first time ever!
I think that's crazy, but it was good! I joked around saying the powdered
sugar looked like crack. We had a lot of laughs. I was definitely all smiles!
I even guessed a distance that a tractor pulled, 312 feet! Maybe it should
be my new favorite number?
I ended up mentioning pizza, so we left to get one.

My poor phone has been dropped so many times I'm surprised it still works.
This time not only did I drop it, but I didn't know I dropped it. Yeah, lovely!
How did I figure out I lost it? Andy said I was calling him. I thought I butt
dialed him so I was looking for my phone in the truck. I had him call the phone
and I remembered it was on vibrate. But instead of me hearing a vibrate, someone
answered a phone. Some guy.
All I could think of was, SHIT!
But he told us he found the phone and we met up with him so he could give it back.
I can't believe that I lost it. And also that it was found and returned!
The guy only called my mom and left a message, my dad and my dad told him to call Andy,
and he did.
All Andy could say was that I was DAMN lucky!

OMG - It's almost time!

So October is less than 10 days away, well the 30th is. I'm not gonna get all technical. All I know is that it's REAL soon. We can at least agree on that.

Well you know that iPad contest I've been in on Kiwibox?
I didn't win the 2nd contest (which was the 1st contest I entered).
Now I've entered the 3rd contest (so this is my 2nd time trying to win).
I almost want to say I have a good chance, but we'll have to wait and see.

I really hope I win. And the whole reason I'd like to win, is my computer screen is cracked.
I can't see a clear picture, whether it's a movie or a web page.
My other laptop is soooooooo slow.
I don't have the money to fix either.
So I figure the iPad could allow me to see things fully, work faster than one of my computers,
and it's FREE.
The only problem is I'd have to get a wireless router...and I'm just a little unsure how that's supposed to work.
I thought I knew how, but it's been so long since I had to mess with it. I don't know what I need.
But I won't do anything until I know I've won it.
I can always take it to the library.
But I'd like to use it at home.
Man, now I sound like I won.
And we won't know yet for a while.

I just thought I'd let ya'll know!! It's soon!

Book Review - One for the Money by Janet Evanovich

I just finished reading One for the Money by Janet Evanovich last night.
It is the first of her 'crime stopping, thrilling adventure' series.
As I've mentioned before, my mom LOVES this series. She recommended
it to me, so I'm recommending it to all of you!

If you're into the 'bad guy stopping' type books, this is for you. It has
a LOT of wit and charm. I've cracked up many times during this book.
It also has a few more serious events that take place. Let me begin by
explaining to you.

Stephanie Plum (the main character), gets laid off and has been laid off for about 6 months. She's tried various odd jobs to keep her apartment, but loses her car to the re-po man, whom she went to high school with. She makes her town of Trenton, New Jersey seem small, but the neighborhoods are filled with big families that are close to one another.

She brings you back to her childhood days, and mentions one person in particular, Joe Morelli. They had a past, but when it comes to Joe Morelli, who hasn't?
Her mother nags, when Stephanie finally admits she's been laid off.
Her family suggests she checks with her cousin Vinnie, who owns a Bail Bonds agency, for a filing job. With the filing job taken, she is told about the Bounty hunting jobs. She gets a taste for greed when there's a bond worth $100,000, and with her getting 10%, she wants to take the case. She convinces her cousin to give her one week.

Then she finds out she's looking for Joe Morelli.
A soon to be ex-cop, who is charged with first degree murder.

You go along for the ride, and it's a heck of a ride. I suggest you get started!

Happy Reading!

Sworn to Silence - Book Review -

Sworn to Silence by Linda Castillo is a very compelling thriller. It is the first book I've read by the author and it will not be my last. I cannot get enough of her style of writing. She lets a lot of details come out, ones that you are looking for but are afraid to find.
I'm new to thrillers and I anticipated this novel to be a good read. It is far from "good" and that's a good thing. It's one of the best yet.
Not only is it about murder but it's about having a will to live. That not only do we have a reason to do so, it's best to have no other choice. I was told that it was to be an extremely gory book, but I found it to be somewhat mild. It's no different than CSI or Bones gore. Yes, the details let your mind wander a little more. They might be strong if you aren't used to reading books like this, but the storyline is captivating. The reveal is such a surprise.
If you're open minded to the many genres of books, then give this one a try. You won't go wrong.
I recommend this to anyone and everyone.

It's that simple..

It's only going on the third month of me living here, and I'm just now starting to see it for what it's worth. Before I moved here all I have come to know this place for was Andy, his cows, the farm.
Now that I'm here, I'm finding ways to make the time to myself enjoyable. I've taken to babysitting 3 mornings a week, with possible Wednesday evenings. I also agreed to babysit this Saturday. Heather *(the woman I sit for) is making it a day for herself and her husband. She'll have a pizza delivered while they're out for me and Ellie to eat. I've been wanting pizza lately.
It's a way to make some extra cash, taking the extra days. It's easy work, tiring, and also rewarding. Spending time with little kids is what I've gotten used to in my early teens. I enjoyed people depending on me for a change, and that might sound selfish. I think that's also when I really got into helping people. I like to think I'm really generous (once you get to know me). In my earlier years I've always wanted to have kids. As I got older (up until now) I enjoy watching kids that aren't mine, for money. It's a fair exchange I think. I get to see the child grow and learn new things. I know I'm only a temporary person in their life, but sometimes it's those times that are crucial. They mean something.
Watching children comes naturally to me. It might be hard to believe, as much as I bicker with my younger brother, but the relationship is different, obviously, when you're related. I prefer babysitting over the fantasy of having kids of my own. It's a nightmare that has a lot of room for screwing up. When they're your own, I can't imagine how to teach things the right way. They can only have so many "How to" books. But there's the fact that you can give them back once you're done with them. I've always heard that from other people. And I agree. I go through a little bit of what I'd have to handle if I were to have my own. And with that said, I would not be upset if I were to not have kids. And it's possible I won't. With my PCOS, I don't think I'd be able to anyway.
But back to my admiration of where I live.
I didn't have the pleasure of taking a short trip to Amish Country before I moved here. It would take a lot more gas, money, and time. I love living close. I love being able to take in my neighboring surroundings. I anxiously await the fall. When the trees start to change, you can bet your bottom I'll be in my car with my camera, capturing the rolling hills of color. I might even make a pit stop for apple cider.
I really grasp for the simple life. By being able to take in my surroundings, knowing that I'm not far from home, and seeing how beautiful it is, is very comforting. I feel like every bit of what I want is right at my fingertips. Surrounding me with fresh air and the opportunities I've been longing for.
I've always been a big fan of the country. I think even more so as I got older. I eventually appreciated the time I found for myself. To develop these hobbies (photography and painting) that can make me feel even closer to nature. And that's the main thing that draws me to my photography and paints. Nature. The country. The glorious life that surrounds me, daily. I can't get enough.
There are a few reasons why I'm drawn to scenic photography/painting. You can't mess up. You can't go wrong. There is not a wrong angle or subject. You are not limited to what you can create. It's already created for you, your job is to capture it. I enjoy capturing the moments that catch my eye. The scenery that makes me daydream. The images I picture when I think of the country.
Whereas, when you have a person (or one single topic) that can't be altered like nature. You can't take your favorite pieces and throw them together like you can with nature. Nature allows you to do that. Nature accepts you.
I know I'm probably sounding like some tree hugging hippie, but I'm really letting the wind embrace me while I'm capturing the moments on camera. I let it take me away. Only then can I snap a picture and be satisfied with the result.
It's something to think about.

The Butterfly Effect

The Butterfly Effect
By Epik Ride

The Butterfly Effect
By Andy Andrews

Thomas Nelson Publisher.


The Butterfly Effect by Andy Andrews, was something that I think everyone should read. We can all grasp the meaning behind what the butterfly effect really is. It is a small amount of proof that what we do really matters. The actions we make can and will effect many lives in this world. I enjoyed the message the author displayed in this informative piece. It made me think and pay more attention to how the butterfly effect is all around me. And all around you.
I would read it forever if he could keep going back, telling us how one action lead to another. It was very fascinating. It is something I have never thought much about. I have not thought about how important my choices are when it comes to something this big. It helps prove that our choices are important enough to make a difference. We always have someone to thank or maybe even blame for where we are today. We might blame people for the negative impact, but if it brought us to where we wanted to be we can be thankful.
Thomas Nelson has provided me with an advanced reading copy.

Road trip to Amish Country (Holmes County, Walnut Creek, OH)

The past few days have been good days. I've been in a good mood (as in: not depressed). I've been doing a TON of reading. I finished Witch & Wizard, as well as, Maximum Ride: The Final Warning. I found both to be enjoyable. The last Maximum Ride book was shorter than the others in the series, but still a great read! I wanted more with the ending, as always.

Now I'm finally reading Sworn to Silence by Linda Castillo. I've been excited about this book for a while. Mainly because of where the *fictional* story takes place. Holmes County, Ohio. I just took a road trip to there. Where I live, I'm not far from Holmes County. Today I went to Walnut Creek. It was a nice drive. It was windy, a little mild, but I wasn't dying. I took some really great pictures and edited them through picnik.com.

A reason to write is a good one.

Well it's September and I'm ready for Autumn to come! It's my favorite season. My favorite month is October. I can't wait until I can buy good apple cider. I enjoy the light jacket weather. I'm not looking forward to the winter months. I hope we have a decent fall this year. It's my first fall living in New Philly, and I can't wait for the country to turn beautiful colors.

But I'm getting ahead of myself. I'm mostly looking for good weather, not too hot, not too cold. That was supposed to be back in the Spring, but it's been so ridiculously hot and no fun. It's been hotter here in Ohio than in Florida. Ever since we moved back to Ohio from Florida, the weather has kind of turned on us. When we lived in Florida, the weather was un-godly hot. But when we move they get a tiny bit of snow and tons of rain! The only time it would rain down there is during tropical storms. I don't ever remember a hurricane while living there. If there was one, we got the tropical storm, no big damage. Tree branches would be in the yard the following morning, but nothing major. Some power outages. I remember sitting with the windows open, a cool breeze coming through, and just relaxing while it rained. We'd light the candles around the living room and watch the rain race down the street.

I also remember heat lightning. Those were more dangerous. If it had been particularly dry, that would cause fires. And since the grass sucked down there, it was frequent. I kind of miss it. I haven't been back since we moved to Ohio in 2001 or 2002. Yeah, I remember because I was in 5th grade when we were let out when September 11th happened. The anniversary isn't far away.

This blog is completely random, and I have no problem with that. At least I found something to write about. I haven't been able to think of anything to write about. I've stared at a blank page for the past two days, and I'm glad I'm able to write something. Not sure about a title though.

Oh well. Let's see. I'll start  babysitting 15 hours a week. Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Fridays.
I babysat for 8 hours today. Went to the mall after. Stuffed my face. Went to the bookstore and bought Sworn to Silence by Linda Castillo. I've been waiting to read it, but I haven't gotten done with the books I got from the library. So I bought it. (heehee)
I'm almost done with Witch & Wizard by James Patterson. I have 3 other books to read. I hope to get them done. At the very least I'd like to finish the last Maximum Ride book. I'd have to start it first, but I should be getting to that soon. Maybe I'll hold off on the other 2 books, and just add them to a list to get some other time. So I can get to reading the books that I OWN. I have a TON of books that are mine.
Yay for reading!!

I Love Bones!

I've taken the liberty of torturing myself and re-watching Bones, starting with Season One, on Netflix.
Even though I've seen just about every episode, (a few I didn't remember), I still find myself screaming at the screen "JUST KISS HER ALREADY!" to Booth and Bones. Ever since the first few episodes, you KNEW there was chemistry. They avoid it and play it off like it's nothing. The other characters KNOW something is up. Many of them encourage Bones to get with Booth.
But then people also say that if they hook-up that it would be the end of the show. WHY would it have to be? The ending of last season, they were so close to giving it a shot. I almost wanted to hate Bones and Booth a little bit for not kissing at the airport. UGH! It really drives me crazy! Even I feel the tension! How ridiculous is that?
As soon as I started re-watching the episodes, I would automatically notice the tension between them. Ugh, it's so HOT!

So far, so good.

Saturday I went to the Dover Library book sale. It was fill a grocery bag for $2. And I had 2 big bags. I got maybe 30 books for $4. I haven't went through them all yet. I did get a few interesting ones. I got one about Ancient Mysteries. I got The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants, I've never read it. I picked up a lot that I've never heard of. I'm sure I'll be busy for the rest of my life. I still haven't finished any of the other books yet.

I applied for a job at the Library here. I can walk there, and I do whenever I go. It would be great to work there. It's not much, 12 hours a week, 3pm-6pm Monday through Thursday. I'm babysitting Friday and just got a text asking if I can babysit next Monday and Wednesday because the other babysitter is on vacation. Of course I"ll do that. And the babysitting is 7am-noon. It's only $5 an hour. Whereas the Library job is $8 an hour. But hey, it would be a lot of help for me! And I love being at the library and spending time with kids. I've always babysat.

I went to check on my application at the Library today, but the lady who does the hiring was sick, and I was told I could come back tomorrow, so I will do that.

More books..and stuff

Today wasn't too bad. Andy came over and we ran some errands. I got my tires rotated and was amazed at how fast they got it done. Less than 10 minutes and they were done. Dale showed up, it was funny. Then Andy and I went to have lunch. I went to the library and applied for two positions there. Andy told me about them, said they were in the newspaper. Talked to my mom for over an hour on the phone. Just a little bit of everything. Oh and I got a couple of books, I tried not to, but I checked to see if a book was there and it was. So I can add Maximum Ride: The Final Warning by James Patterson, to my list of books, as well as The Dangerous Days of Daniel X by James Patterson.
I'm on some sort of Patterson kick, I think. I'm still pushing myself to read Witch & Wizard by Patterson as well. Oh dear. I always get myself into this. At this rate, I'll never be able to read my own books. Now, that's my problem. I always have to read the books I don't have instead of reading the books I do have and then find books I don't have at the library when I run out of books that I do have. But I enjoy the books either way.
So once I read these books, then I'll do my reviews and then I'll be satisfied. Hopefully.
I'll also reserve the two books by Linda Castillo, Sworn to Silence and Pray for Silence.

Dreams and Talents

This blog is going to prove how untalented I am! Well, in a way it might show how creative I want to be.
I read an article on Yahoo! about a woman who buys clothing from thrift stores and yard sales, the most ugliest of muumuus and turns them into great outfits. One every day, for a year, with a budget of one dollar a day. I took a look at her blog and the outfits. I loved the idea. I wish I had me some sewing skills. I'd like to know how to hem and trim and make my own fashion out of thrifty buys!

I've also been in a piano music mood. I've been getting songs into my head and would find a piano version of it on YouTube, and just listen to them over and over. I love piano music! My boyfriend plays piano, and I'd love for him to keep at it. He's amazing. When we have our own place, I'll make sure there's a piano in the house. It might not be his dream piano, but it will be a nice one! And I will learn to play! I'd love to learn now, but I don't even have a keyboard, so I'll just dream about it.

I've never taken any kind of lesson for anything. The most I ever did as a kid was join Girl Scouts for a couple years. I wish I would have taken piano lessons.
A girl I knew had a piano (it wasn't fancy, but it was a heavy upright) and we were listening to My Chemical Romance. We played "Welcome to the Black Parade" 's intro over and over, because it was a piano intro. Very simple. Very few keys. I sat at the piano, she stayed by the CD player, and I sought out the keys and learned it by ear. For someone who has never played an instrument successfully in her life and with no prior knowledge of what keys were what note, I was extremely pleased with myself. It's very simple, and it got me super excited.

I still wonder if I can teach myself to play other songs by ear. I'd love to do that. I'd love to play my own music. I don't know how to read or write it (my boyfriend does) and I'm not about to learn. A few people I know who were in band back in high school have told me that it's tough to learn, and that learning to play the instrument is easier than studying the score sheet.

Oh well, as long as I get to express myself through music. I'd love to learn guitar, preferably acoustic. Mainly so I can strum a country song and sing to myself on rainy days. Or if we ever have the privilege of having a nice front porch on our house, complete with rocking chairs and a swing, then I'd whip out my ol' guitar and be my own version of Taylor Swift. Oh how lovely that would be! I'll do it, I will! Some day.

Getting it together..

Alright, so it's been a few days. My bad. Not much has really been going on. I haven't had a regular night's sleep. I can hardly sleep anymore. I stay up too late. I really need to stop doing that. Maybe it's because I feel like I have so much to be worrying about. I have a headache coming on. I really don't feel like much right now. I need to get things figured out. I'm always feeling that way. I always have to figure something out. I understand that's how life is, but sometimes I wish I could have a break. I wish something could come a bit easier to me. Either a decent topic to blog about or what to do with my life and how to do it.
I need things to flow nicely for once. Not many flaws. Is that so much to ask for?
Apparently so, because it hasn't happened. Ever. If something goes right, at the right time, then I usually think that it's too good to be true, and something bad must be going to follow after it. That could be my problem, but it usually happens without me saying it will.
I think I'm finally over the last couple of weeks. I don't feel odd anymore. I think I've let it go. I think my own brain won't tolerate anymore of the stupid contents of the bad parts of my past.
Damn, my head. I'll cut it short. I'll go take a shower, make some tea, make a few calls, and watch something on Netflix while I have that free trial.

Will we Expire?

I know we all expire eventually, in death. But that's not the kind of expiration date I'm talking about. I'm wondering if and when relationships expire? Friendships and your time with your significant other. Those kinds of relationships. After spending what I thought was a good time with certain people, I'm sometimes left wondering if we'll expire. Will it end up being that I'm not that fun anymore? Will they lose interest? Will they just drift away and I'm left alone wondering what went wrong? Could I prevent such things from happening? Sometimes I feel as though I'm not that fun. Like they could have more fun without me. I'm always told that friends and boyfriends come and go. I understand that. 

Sometimes I feel as though taking a breath of air is just a waste of time. But I find myself craving the fresh air that fill my lungs. I crave and rebel against that urge to give up. I keep going, it must mean something. I'm not even sure why I'm writing this. But sometimes, like today, I feel as though there are better things than being with me. I'm not sure. I know it's not all about me, I'm not trying to sound selfish or anything. I'm just wondering if I can get over that paranoia of not being wanted anymore. 

Wetlands Book Review

I just finished Wetlands by Charlotte Roche. I have never read anything remotely similar to this, ever.
I don't even know where to begin. There should be a warning label on the book. Maybe there was and I've overlooked it. Although, this book was recommended by someone, and out of curiosity I read it. They said that they were shocked when they had read it. Clearly, it shocked me. I laughed several times throughout the book. Maybe my humor is that dark and disgusting? I'm not sure, but this book had some disgusting parts. I had to finish the book, because it was like a bad wreck, you just couldn't look away. You secretly wanted to know all the intimate details, but you couldn't stop and ask. With this book, you don't ask, nor do you want to and yet you still find out all the helpless information that Helen (the main character) likes to share. I will say that there is a lot of explicit material hidden in this tiny book. Good or bad, I still can't be the judge of it, even for myself. I'm not sure who I'd recommend it to, or if I'd even recommend it. I could recommend it on a dare. It is extremely daring. If you don't have a weak stomach and enjoy something completely random. Go for it, I dare you. But if you have a weak stomach and you could spare the intimate details, then this book isn't for you. I'm not sure what else to say about this book. Enter at your own risk.

I'm not THAT gullible.

Ok, it's official. I will now rant and vent all I want about this issue. Fraud on Facebook.
Someone I know through Facebook was friends with "Mike Rowe". You know, guy host of Dirty Jobs? The voice of Ford and other popular commercials? Yeah, him. Well at first I didn't think anything of it, I asked her, "Is that really him?" She believed it was. I added him, because whoever it was was pretty funny. Then it started to die down. Some chick named "Jen" claimed to be his girlfriend. Then they said they got married. She changed her last name to Rowe. They didn't want to go public about the marriage, but they went public on freaking FACEBOOK?! So watch out for Jen Rowe and Michael Greg. Oh, and "Michael Greg" used to be "Mike Rowe". That has two different stories to it as well. According to "Mike", he told me that there was an issue with a girl on his friends list and she reported him. That account was deleted. It wouldn't of been an issue (if that were the case) if he was the real deal, right? But "Jen" told me that he accidentally deleted his account. I know that Facebook likes to change the site every now and then, but how could you "accidentally" delete an account? Doesn't it ask you to confirm as much?
So watch out for those two. They might change their names after this is published, if this gets to them. They are no longer on my friends list. THEY deleted me. Why?

"Jen Rowe" posted pictures, and claimed that they were of herself. They are NOT of her, and I have proof.
The pictures are of an actress I recognized. There's strike one. Who is this actress? Her name is Amy Davidson. She played Kerry on 8 Simple Rules, you know, that show John Ritter was on when he passed away? Then later on David Spade took over as their cousin, who lived with the family? Yup. She was saying that those pictures, of Amy Davidson, were her "Jen Rowe". People were buying it! Just Google it people!

For those who bought it, you are DUMB! For those who think I'm a nark and a bitch, I don't care what you think of me. She's using those pictures ILLEGALLY! Because they are NOT her. I was deleted from their friends list, because I found her out. I caught her in the act. She tried to explain that she looks a lot like that actress, she admitted to not knowing the actresses name and has never heard of the show. Well, someone will call her out on it. Sadly, it wasn't me.

NOW, if she told her friends, "Hey, this isn't really me, but I look similar to her." then that I would understand. Sort of. But saying that those pictures were indeed her! Need I say more?

Maximum Ride: Saving the World and Other Extreme Sports *Spoiler*

So I just finished Maximum Ride: Saving the World and Other Extreme Sports by James Patterson. This is the third installment of the Maximum Ride series. I absolutely LOVE these books.

I enjoy the adventure. The twists and turns. The characters, most of all! I love Max and her snarky comebacks! I love her sense of humor. But most of all, I love her and Fang together. I'm mushy like that.

So if you've never heard of or read any of the Maximum Ride series, or anything by James Patterson, then I suggest that you find them at your local library and start reading! Seriously, for it being Young Adult, I enjoyed how easy it was to relate. It wasn't a difficult read, but some things took me by surprise. I'm not saying that mutant bird kids are supposed to be dumb. I've never met or heard about, in any book, mutant bird kids. I'm not exactly sure what genre this falls under, but it's more Sci-Fi for me, and these kids were created in a science lab, so Science Fiction works for me. Unless Sci-Fi means something different now? Haha.

I will say, though, some of the turns are expected, like Angel being evil. Because she started to control minds and such in the second book. But what I didn't expect about it, is that it was all just a part of Max's plan! I give her a TON of Kudos. I love that kid. I'm always left with wanting more. James Patterson does an amazing job. Maximum Ride: The Angel Experiment was my first book by Patterson that I've read and I can't get enough. The way he separates his chapters makes the book go by so quickly. It makes it a fast and easy read.

Again, it's a Young Adult series, like Twilight, and you see how crazy adults got over those. So go for it. I'm 19 and I love these books! They're something different and they're beautifully written. You'll fall in love with the characters, and want so much more from them. They truly deliver a punch in the action parts of the books. I can't get enough. 5/5 stars!

"Mr. Hollywood"

This might just be Part I. So with that said, I'll keep it light and inconspicuous.
There's this guy. He "looks" like a celebrity. That probably gave it away, huh?
If not, then good. If so, I have reason for talking about him.
Because he's been talking shit to my friends.
He's been a complete and TOTAL asshole to my friends. He doesn't know when or HOW to back off! He just keeps insults coming, thinks he's hot shit! Well, I'm sorry he thinks he's better than everyone because he can't get a REAL job that calls for REAL talent!
I thought he'd be old enough to know better, I believe I've made a similar point to him before.

If you know me, then you know me to be a nice person. I'm not saying that I'm a MEAN person, but when I'm on the defense I have a known mean streak in me that only comes out when needed. So I can be bitchy, rude, sassy, whatever you want to call it. I won't take it as an insult. I have plenty to say about people like you, quick to judge. I understand the part about defending friends when people "attack", but not knowing who they are and attacking them back is immature.

No, I know this person well enough to know that he's a complete arrogant asshole. The world would be better off without people like him. NEWSFLASH: There wouldn't be many people left if these "types" were eliminated, sadly these "types" are often looked upon as "idols" or "icons" in this sick and twisted world we live in. There are other sick freaks out there, but these ones are overlooked. Because they know how to put on a facade of an "ideal being" when they're really just a manipulative piece of shit! That's putting it lightly.

If this man would treat people better instead of being a man whore, then maybe I wouldn't be dogging the guy. But instead, I've chosen to say such things because of his immature behavior.

I can't go back...

Ever since I went back to Columbus to be with my mom so that she wasn't alone after finding out about the death of my grandpa, I realized how hard it was to go back. Memories flooded my mind as I made the drive back. Harsh tears burning my eyes as I remembered the drive back, in the past, usually meant it was time to "go back home". But I wasn't going back, not for that reason. It was my first trip back since I moved out almost two months ago. And the month leading up to my departure, was a nightmare. I didn't want to relive all of that, but I braced myself and helped support my mom.

Going back to that apartment, was the toughest thing I had ever done. It made me queasy, with both the familiar and unfamiliar smells. I couldn't believe that it all happened this way. I had made plans to spend two days with my friend in Pickerington, and my family. But I wouldn't of visited my grandpa, if he were alive. It's sad, but true. I didn't want to walk in on something I didn't want to see. Either a slew of hookers or him dead. And if I would have went there Friday like I had planned, he would have been dead.

I realized after the few days I spent down there, that I can't go back. I can't live in Columbus. I can't live in Whitehall. I just can't go back. I feel like I know too much going back. It feels like I stick out like a sore thumb. It's just so strange. I still think it's odd. And I've never felt so creeped out in my own apartment. It's slowly going away though.

Photo Editing

Ok, so the past hour or so I've been borderline obsessed with editing my pictures through Picnik.com. I'm even editing pictures for my cousin. It's something to do at 2:30 in the morning, and I'm feeling creative.

Me and Books

When it comes to me and what books I choose to read, I usually fall under the spell of mushy romance novels. My imagination runs wild during the hot and heavy romps that I'm exposed to in the delicious books I pick out. But recently I've broadened the types of books I've been reading. I still pick up a romance novle, but I enjoy something that's funny, like 3X Carlin: An Orgy Of George by George Carlin, Lamb by Christopher Moore, Why We Suck by Denis Leary, The Groucho Letters by Groucho Marx, and Harpo Speaks! by Harpo Marx. I need the book to draw me in instantly. But lately I've been reading books that my favorite show Bones is based upon. So I've picked up a few books by Kathy Reichs and I LOVE them. So far I've read Monday Mourning by Kathy Reichs and Break No Bones by Kathy Reichs. I recommend every book I'm mentioning.

I usually hated the books I had to read for school. If I ever had to read MacBeth again, I'd rather be shot in the foot. I'm not into that kind of writing. To me it sounds so illiterate and boring. I don't like when I have to do research on every single page of ONE Act! It's ridiculous. If it were something that needed interpreting, don't you think it would be written simply? Nah. Of course it wouldn't. That's what made up my entire first semester my senior year in high school. I hope Shakespeare is happy. The old coot.

Yes, I've read the Twilight Saga, well most of it. I haven't finished Breaking Dawn, I have them all here though. When I get the time I'll just start over. I've read other vampire books also. There's one by Lyndsay Sands Vampires Are Forever, that was really good. It's apart of a series as well. I've read some novels with "Highlander" in the title.

I recommend anything by Sarah Dessen, though. The Truth About Forever by Sarah Dessen, would probably be my favorite of hers, so far. I can't say I have an absolute favorite book of all time, but I've read a lot of good books that I would recommend to anyone.

I use an application on Facebook called Visual Bookshelf. It's where you find the books you have read, are currently reading, or want to read. It saves them to your "bookshelf" and you can rate the book, write a review for the book, recommend the book to one of your Facebook friends, and there's an option where you choose if you own the book, want the book, or borrowed the book. It's a great and simple application that I love! But applications would be another blog altogether when it comes to Facebook. I've found a couple of books through Virtual Bookshelf, that I will reserve from the Library when I get my pile of books down. I don't want to overwhelm myself with books, again. I'm very good at doing that. The two books I'm looking at are: Sworn To Silence by Linda Castillo and Pray For Silence by Linda Castillo. They seemed very interesting, being a murder mystery about a family of Amish, from Holmes County, Ohio, slaughtered in their home. Being fascinated by murder mysteries now, I thought I'd add those books to the list on that application. They were recommended to me, through the application. And from that I'm loving the application more and more. It helps me organize what I read and what I am reading and what I want to read. I love that I get to recommend books. It makes me wish I was friends with EVERYONE on Facebook, so I could recommend books to ALL OF YOU, whoever you might be.

Maximum Ride *Spoiler*

What can I say about the Maximum Ride series by James Patterson? Well, it's my first time readong anything by this author and in this genre. I'm not exactly sure what category it fits into, but to me it's somewhat of a sci-fi adventure for Young Adults. Yeah, I'm 19, and I still enjoy the Young Adult section. There are some really great books hanging around in that part of the library. Some of those books, I'm somewhat surprised are targeting young adults, but then again looking at the current generation--it's not that surprising.

Before I get extremely off topic, let me just say that I'm in the middle of the third book, Maximum Ride: Saving the World and Other Extreme Sports. Also, when I was finishing the second book and starting the third, I knew Angel was going to be the evil one, but then I didn't see the plan her and Max had coming. I was very confused and felt like Max, that everything was a lie. I'm sure things will add up in the end, or at the beginning of another book.

I've been into series and sagas before, but this is different. I love how James Patterson delivers his books. I've noticed that they're all in the same or a similar context. Short chapters and to the point. I've always seen his books everywhere, he's written a ton! But I've never picked one up and read it cover to cover. Now that I have, I'm happy to add him to my list of Favorite Authors. My list of Favorite Authors isn't very long, but I'm expanding it a bit. I'm reading things I wouldn't normally read. I've been getting into genres I wouldn't normally wander into.

This will end up being two different topics from the Title. So I'll continue this little bit in another blog.

Another day

Today was another somewhat busy day. Yesterday was busier. Yesterday I babysat for 3 hours, went to open a new bank account, went to the mall and went to the Chinese buffet. Then I went inside Waldenbook Store and found a book by Denis Leary for $1. I talked to my mom for a couple hours. I got poured on. I went to the dollar store to get light bulbs, and noticed that Halloween stuff is already up.

Today I went to Wal-Mart to buy some fruit, went to the dollar store to buy a few other things. I went to Big Lots to buy some juice. I went to the mall to buy Brit a copy of that Denis Leary book. I found a couple other books. Rainwater by Sandra Brown. and Mistress of the Art of Death by Ariana Franklin. Should be an interesting time. I'll write reviews for the other books I'm currently reading.

Weird Dream from 8/3/2010

Before I get into the details of the dream I'm going to tell you (for those who may not know) that my grandpa died last week (they're thinking the 28th of July). Now with that said I will also tell you that: I used to live with him, for about 7 or 8 months. I moved out of my parents house after my mom and I got into an argument. My grandpa was kicked out, and in the heat of the moment, I was "kicked out" as well. I stayed with my grandma for a couple of weeks (that didn't work out because of her religion--that can be another blog post). So when my grandpa found a place, I moved in with him. Now I didn't know what kind of life style he was living during the last few months living in my parents' basement (he moved into my parents' place a year after he moved out of the house he was renting--my step grandma had died there July 29th, 2006). I found out upon moving in with him, that he was getting back into drinking and hanging out with whores at strip clubs. It eventually got worse. I moved out on June 12th of this year, to New Philadelphia (from Columbus). I got used to having my own things really quickly.

After hearing about his death, I dropped everything and went back to Columbus to help my mom (who was left to do everything) because I didn't want her going through that alone.
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Now onto the details of my dream:

It was at grandpa's (old) apartment, the room that used to be mine. My dresser, bed and night stand are the only pieces of furniture that I saw. My grandpa was pale, and sleeping on my bed. The snoring sounded real, but I knew it wasn't. (so I was aware in the dream). He was pale but somewhat translucent. The glow of the room was blue, with the red glow of my alarm clock numbers. The window blinds were open, I could see the trees outside, but I didn't see any green. It looked as though it were gray outside. It wasn't dark and it wasn't bright. My mom was there, but she couldn't see my grandpa. We were trying to get my cell phone charger and get out fast. So my mom stood on top of my bed trying to avoid my grandpa, I was giving her directions. She didn't want to touch him, although he couldn't see us, she couldn't see him, but I could see him. He kept sliding off the bed, onto the floor, and the only words I could make out are, "Time to go live the old life." He would mumble that over and over as he was sliding off of the bed and sliding back onto the bed. There was a vacuum in the room, right by the bed, and he would grab hold of it one time while sliding off and trying to get back on the bed. His eyes were closed. He was fully clothed (shirt and jean shorts). I remember seeing my bedroom doorway, the hallway, and the living room door/front door.

That's all I remember. I don't know what it means, maybe I'll go figure it out.

Hello Blogger.

I probably have a few Blogger accounts floating around in cyber space, but I'm just going to start fresh. I've never been good at remembering login information. Hopefully I remember the information for this account.


I've been wanting to start something semi-official. I'm not looking to make a legit blogging site, this will do. I hope I can stick to it. If not every day then a few times a week. I really would like to get back into writing either a journal or a blog. I don't know why I can't stick with either one. Having a routine is nice, but sometimes it can be a drag. 


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So today I babysat. I think I butt-dialed Alexa while I was babysitting. Oops. :)
My mom sent her a text letting her know.
My mom and I talked for a few hours, it seemed. I told her about my weird dream.
Maybe I could save my dream for another blog. It was strange.